If you have spent much time on tiktok, you probably have that assinine Chrissy wake up song stuck in your head. I know I do. Morning all, hope you are well. I’m in the midst of some dishes and laundry work here at the house. My beloved is asleep.
As I am stuck in the kitchen, I’ve been handwashing the dishes for the most part. It’s theraputic, and I’m about ready to scream. It seems that everytime I turn around, the man is asleep in bed.
I can’t get anything done in the dungeon/office, and I’m getting frustrated. Doing dishes is much safer than screaming my fool head off. It’s also much kinder than whacking him upside the head with a skillet. Yes, I’m grouchy. I get it.
I don’t have the right to take my frustrations out on him or Young Master Duke. It’s my own fault that I am not practicing the program. Needless to say, thanks to the Voldemort virus, it has been over a month since my last meeting.
I know that with the virus levels really high in my community again, I am better off staying at home. Yet nothing beats drinking horrible coffee in a room of lunatics in recovery. It’s like the pressure cooker is taken off the high burner for an hour.
Sometimes, it’s like the pressure cooker is run under cold water, and the world is a better place. Yet, there’s nothing I can do to fix this. The worst part, I caught the virus and brought it home by going to a meeting.
I can’t put my Beloved’s life in danger again from the virus. How would I make amends to him if I did that? How does one make the amends to someone you put in the grave by exposing them to a disease that could kill them?
So, instead, I have to get over myself, and the bullsheet in my head. It’s time to get back to doing the dishes.
Take care my friends, Hugs, gentle distance ones. -L
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