I took a nap


Hello again, a little evening update. There are days I swear there are not enough cusswords. Today was one of them. It rained most of the day.

My beloved is still in a crap ton of pain, and is trying to do things himself. He has gotten past the ‘man cold’ level and is trying for now.

There are times when even our best isn’t good enough. I used to wear scrubs a very long time ago, but can’t anymore. I think he finally realized that today. He needed adjusting in bed. I got hurt trying.

We got to the point where he was insulting my family again, and I blew my stack. I left. I had one hour before I had to get the grocery order, and I just left. I couldn’t at that moment anymore. Don’t worry, he was in a safe position, in his wheelchair when I left him. He had access to the rest room, to water, and an ashtray.

Some greasy french fry therapy and a soda later, I sat in the store’s parking lot waiting. He started texting, and I reminded him that I am his wife. That I deserve respect. Yes, he is in a crap ton of pain, and my back will heal, but I deserve to be treated with dignity.

I reminded him that we have been together for 20 years. I know its not easy living with me, I get it. I do one thing well, and that is staying sober. The rest, well…. You know. We came to a cease fire. I picked up the groceries, and came home.

It’s not the mansplaining that blows my stack. It isn’t the whining that sets me off. It’s the total disrespect. There are days when it isn’t bad at all. Then there are other days.

His back surgery just cranked up the fire on both of our character defects. We will get through, and keep on. Right now, it is one of those ‘for worse’ weeks. Soon enough it will get better.

On another note, I received a call back from my own medical people. I start physical therapy for some of my own problems in 10 days. I think it will be worth the effort.

Meanwhile, I’m going to grab an ice pack, and listen to some true crime podcasts. Have a good night all. -L

One moment in time


Morning all, it’s been a lovely day so far. Um… sorta. We are doing the best we can with what we have been given.

This afternoon, I’m going to pick up a grocery order. I’m going to enjoy the escape for a few minutes. I think if I can swing it, I will get to meeting tomorrow.

My beloved… let’s just say while the surgery went well, he is still the man I married. I didn’t kiss a frog and have him turn into a Prince of the Realm. I’m currently using every skill I learned in both Alanon and in therapy to not dent a cast-iron skillet over his head.

BRB, I really need another cup of coffee. Hang on a second. I’m gonna lurk.

ONE ETERNITY LATER….

You would think that I would know better. I swear. Coffee has been grabbed, Young Master Duke has been let inside and given treats… And a 20 minute discussion on the role of the Monarchy in a foreign country and the line of who is gonna sit on the throne later….

Living with a person in constant pain is hard. When that person’s motherboard doesn’t all light up it is harder. When some of the connections on that motherboard are corroded…

I promise, I have not used my cast iron to knock any sense into anyone. I swear, I have never harmed anyone with a skillet upside the head.

My friends, it’s a frustrating time. He has pain meds, and they are jacking his brain nine ways to Sunday. Please bear with me in the meantime. Hugs. -L

Break


Morning, let’s grab a cuppa together. Smoke em if you got em.

It’s been an interesting couple of days. I am wrapped up in a lava lava, and my sweetheart is growling again. He’s starting to feel the pain from the surgery. Sighs. I was hoping he would be more comfortable yet today. I know he is going to need time to heal.

Wednesday was mostly confusion and pain. Once we got home, I crashed, after letting Duke out and in. Driving home was a beast, as I was long out of spoons.

I am so grateful to the staff that took care of my husband.

These are random thoughts today, I’m still overwhelmed.

On my side of the vehicle, I made it to my Dr. Was recommended to do a walkin at orthopedic. While my husband was being operated on, I was spoken to and xrayed 9 ways to sunday.

I am thinking that I will be glowing in the dark for awhile. Also, I was touched and inspected by more people than I have physically spoken to in over a couple of years. Sighs.

Meanwhile, to confess. I was the horrible driver cutting people off Wednesday. I was so distracted and rattled, my license should be given back to the folks at cracker jack.

Take care my friends, take care. -L