Rain and Change

Back to Worthington. Dad kicked me out April 1st. He is a hoarder, and I was arranging cleanup. He treasured garbage more than me. So, my life of a gypsy is over. Wandering back and forth is done.

The next time hubs and I have an argument, I will just go to the garage, my she-cave, and shut the door. That’s how we are settling our differences. Hubs lives in the house full time. I am in the garage, with my computer gear, books, yarn and the like most of the time. I like it in here. I’ve made it my home away from everyone else’s home.

How’s recovery working lately?

Oy…. Last night I was forbidden to knit during a meeting. I’m tired. It was hell sitting in a meeting without notebook, journal, or anything. Sighs. Kinda makes retirement from meetings looking good. What would I say to a sponsee? I’d tell them to buck up buttercup and move on. So, recovery is my top priority still. What did I do last night? I maliciously complied. Life goes on.

So, what am I doing to stay clean and or sober today? I’ve been in touch with members for most of the morning. I’ve been focusing on distractions. I’ve been listening to the rain. I’ve been replying to messages, and thinking about helping the alkie or addict who still suffers.

Why am I so jittery today? There’s a mild anxiety in the background. I’ve got to clean the office today, and with the rain, it’s making it quite interesting. With the hubs asleep in the old office, I can’t go in and make noise moving furniture and books to the garage. It’s a give and take.

He let me sleep last night. With the crummy weather, I have been in much more pain than usual. I’ve had an IBS FLARE since late April. It’s slowly turning into a Fibro flare. Sighs. So, the best thing I do when I’m in this much pain is distract and wait it out. I was in so much pain last night, that I screamed in my sleep a couple of times. Taking pills just doesn’t work.

So, that’s the update. Hope all is well with you. -L


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