Resentment and grieving

I am still grieving for a little puppy person. He would have been one years old next week.

I want to rage and scream and cry.

Nothing I can do.

If this and that would not have happened , they wouldn’t have been on the farm. If this and that would not have happened ….

I am angry and hurt.

Add to that the crap that happened 3 days after Jesse died.

I spend quite a few days craving a drink, wanting to get high, wanting oblivion.

I am having a hard time going to meetings right now.

I don’t want to speak to anyone right now.

Sighs.

I better quit whinging and get my butt to sleep.