The battlefield.


It is my fault. I have been focusing on a thousand things, and very little has to do with my recovery. Recent events have helped me to focus on a different area of my sobriety journey.

My husband and I have been struggling for several years. I have thought about divorce for a long time. I finally started praying over it, after talking with two different law firms. I was too poor for the one, and too rich for another.

I hit my knees.

Finally, step 8 hit home. I had never forgiven my husband for any thing. 

I carried my grudges, and fed them. I no longer knew what was real or not in our marriage.

I turned to non-conference approved materials. The first, a movie called The war room. I started with a small notebook, I started pinning sheets of paper with prayers and scriptures to my wall in my bedroom. 

II also turned to an older movie, called Fireproof. I had tried the love dare system before, but gave up. I hadn’t forgiven him.

I hadn’t applied the program. I am working on it, slowly, and one day at a time. I am not innocent either. I have so many amends to make.

That is all for now.