Focusing on other things right now

I am going to be offline for awhile.
This is why.
I am powerless, I have to just stand by and let it happen. I didn’t cause it. I can’t fix it, I can’t stop it, I can’t control it. I have to let go. Dear God this is hard. I just have to wait, pray, and let it happen.
It’s not about me, but my heart is breaking. There is nothing else I can do. I have to let it run its course.
Why am I able to stay clean and sober when someone else can’t?
I know, I know, it is the disease. I have heard it said that this or that person died so others can live.
In dealing with alcohol and drugs, that is utter crap. People die because of this disease and there is no cure.

I am alive. I will live through this. God willing, one day, one tear, one step at a time, I will be okay.
I am going to take a break from the internet for awhile, it is time to take care of my family and myself.
Louise Ann Benjamin

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