Focusing on other things right now

I am going to be offline for awhile.
This is why.
I am powerless, I have to just stand by and let it happen. I didn’t cause it. I can’t fix it, I can’t stop it, I can’t control it. I have to let go. Dear God this is hard. I just have to wait, pray, and let it happen.
It’s not about me, but my heart is breaking. There is nothing else I can do. I have to let it run its course.
Why am I able to stay clean and sober when someone else can’t?
I know, I know, it is the disease. I have heard it said that this or that person died so others can live.
In dealing with alcohol and drugs, that is utter crap. People die because of this disease and there is no cure.

I am alive. I will live through this. God willing, one day, one tear, one step at a time, I will be okay.
I am going to take a break from the internet for awhile, it is time to take care of my family and myself.
Louise Ann Benjamin

I’m a murderess

I’ve been busy today, many many lives have been affected. So many in fact, that I could be considered a murderess.
So far, I’ve probably killed a couple of hundred million mold spores and bacteria. I’ve killed hundreds of flies, and dozens of mosquitoes. Today, that is, I’ve killed them today.
I know, I’m so evil. And I am totally unashamed.
I did not come out unscathed in this battle. I have been bitten a few times. I know, I’m a wounded warrior.
However, I must get back to the battle. I will not be satisfied until they all are dead.
Have a good afternoon,
Louise Ann Benjamin

The Accountability Partner

Hello all,
I’m trying a new set up for posting to the blog, but I wanted to let you know about a new area of my life.
For the next few weeks, I’m going to be my Sister’s accountability partner.
Here is the deal. She has certain goals, that she has to meet for a contest at work. I’m to help keep her in line on it until the 17th of October.
Now here’s the deal. She has weekly goals, that if she doesn’t meet them, I will post photos of her backside to social media every time she misses.
If she makes them, she buys a skein of yarn that I specified, and I will knit or crochet her an afghan for her home. She picks the colors.
Either way, it’s a win/win situation for her, and for me. I’m thinking that she’s going to have a huge afghan, with no posts on social media. She is worried that photos of her rear end are going to be splattered all over the world wide web.
For the family members that are interested, the betting pool is on, and you can get ahold of me in the usual fashion.
That’s all for now, have a great day!
Louise Ann Benjamin

Good Morning

Hello all,
Sorry about the spotty service I’ve been doing here on the blog. Since my Unc had his heart surgery it’s been quite a bit of no blog, but allot of stuff going on.
In my down time, I’ve just been playing computer games. It is where I can just do one or two things in the general area Unc is at. I’ve been trying to be available, but not invasive. I don’t want to “Mother Hen” him too much. There are times when “Mother Hen” activity makes it worse for the patient.
For half of my adult life, I was a nursing assistant, or CNA in Minnesota and South Dakota. In 2003, I ripped my left rotator cuff while transferring a patient from one chair to another. For some reason, she held on to the chair and tried to bring it with her during the transfer. This really screwed my world up, because I was enrolled to go to LPN school on scholarship in the fall. I miss wearing scrubs for a living.
Now, with the arthritis that has set in on my knees, back and shoulder, LPN school just isn’t available to me. I don’t have the lift anymore.
So, back to our regularly scheduled program, and turning away from the regrets.
Today, I’ve got to get caught up on chores. Yesterday was broken up by an ER visit, and then naps to catch up on our sleep. Dad and I took Unc in Sunday night. Unc didn’t come home till after 5 yesterday morning.
However, there is one positive change with the chores. Due to not being able to get to them in time, I fed and watered the chickens yesterday between 6 and 7 in the morning. This morning, I have continued the same. It works.
The rabbits are back to mowing the lawn again. So, every morning and evening, I scoot their cage around the yard another 28″ ahead. In about 12 hours, they get that square ate up, and I don’t have to physically mow that section.
I have dishes to do today, and laundry to catch up on. With Unc here, I might be able to finally video that wash board video for Aunty Sandy. Aunty Mary suggested it, so I still have to do it.
Meanwhile, I need to take some stuff down to the basement, and sort through it. I have to get my room at least liveable, and move the bed to the other side of the room.
Poor Bo, Dad’s dog. She’s confused. Tim and Beamer went back to Minnesota Sunday. She misses them. Unc is sleeping in my normal bed, in my normal bedroom. Bo has gotten used to my being in there. So, she is disgruntled to say the least. Poor girly pup. Getting her sorted out, sadly involves a reprimand when she growls at Unc. She doesn’t understand that this is temporary. So, we will work our way through it.
Lastly, I have to keep trying to get the house ready for cards on Sunday night. I have just a few short days left.
That’s all I’ve got. It’s going to be another hot day out there. Stay cool, drink plenty of water and juice, and be safe.
Louise Ann Benjamin