AnonymousKnitter

I started the day determined to do something blog worthy. Instead, I took care of myself. I read a little, journaled, and rested.

Rough brain day with panic in the background. -L

An old store sewing patterns cabinet is coming in spades for me in the office. -L

Hey all. I figure the rust is just a feature. I got this shelf from the folks that donated the filing cabinets. Score!

The good news is that heck, no one would think that some of my favorites are in here. I am tickled pink. -L

Hey all. Have been organizing a little. Finally have the needles and hooks contained as well. Hopefully soon I can stitch a little. Hugs -L

Morning, trying to pull my head out of my tail this morning.

Okay, I will work on posting. I’m still drained. I found out I need the writing so bad that I don’t dare not try. I will try to write. That’s all I can promise. It may not be daily, like I have been doing, but I will try.

Personally, my sponsor is in town. She stopped by really early one evening and we talked through the mess. I have homework to do. Part of which is working on the office. I need to be able to sew, and yesterday the treadles moved into the garage.

Thank the Gods for the kind people who donated filing cabinets and storage shelves to the cause. Thanks as well for the sweat equity that these kind folks have put into my office as well. Holy crap, I have a card catalogue!

The coffee bar is also taking shape. Soon, I can get a kettle and the other mischief out here. Soon, I can have my tea supplies out here. Soon, I can work on the decorating of the office.

I’m going to decorate in dragons.

Meanwhile, on the resentment front. That is where the hard work comes in. The office work is merely a distraction from the pain and resentments I feel for the moment. It’s some dbt era wise mind distracts shit.

Rather than focus on the things that I can’t control, didn’t cause, and acan’t fix, I’m turning it over while I get to work cleaning the office. Yes, I will be working the steps again. Yes, the work needs getting done on my head, however in this case… Distraction seems wise.

While the steps are a huge tool in my arsenal of recovery, I also need therapy for the problems other than addiction. As an adult who was abused by a psychopath as a child, There is so much to unpack. My current goal is to get through the latest intel on what that psycho did to not just me, but the others.

Rage is horrible. This witch is making Dad’s dying and death all about her.

I better put this post up. My knuckles are white now, and my keyboard needs to live to see another day. Hugs my friends. -L